Separating your life from your spouse during and after a divorce can be difficult. Aside from the financial entanglements you have, you may also share some social ties that aren’t easily divided or broken.
Here’s a basic guide on how you start building some privacy from your spouse as soon as you decide to divorce and after the divorce occurs:
1. Get a private phone
If you’ve been on a shared plan for your cellphone, it’s time to drop that and get a plan of your own. You also need to either replace your old phone or — at a minimum — check the settings and put a new passcode on your current one.
The reason it may be wise to get an entirely new phone is that some spouses will engage in sneaky behavior when they suspect a divorce is coming. There are invisible software programs available that can be downloaded onto a cellphone that will track your every call or text. It’s wiser to avoid the risk.
2. Change all your accounts and passwords
You need to create a list of all your online accounts and passwords and make some changes. When possible, close the old accounts and open new ones. For example, delete your old email account and start a new one — with a password your spouse can’t guess. When it isn’t possible to simply get a new account, go through the settings and make sure that your spouse can’t gain access. Reset all passwords and security questions to something your spouse doesn’t know.
3. Learn how to handle intrusive questions
You could inadvertently be the biggest source of information your spouse has about your private life. It can be terribly difficult to know who you can trust with your private information after a divorce — and a lot of people will ask questions that are intrusive.
Learn to respond to questions about how you are doing — or what you are doing — with vague statements like, “Oh, I’m managing.” Have a few stock comments in mind that don’t give anything away and only share your personal information with a few of your closest friends.
Keep in mind, the more high-profile a couple you were, the more curious people will be about your situation. Your attorney can help you find other ways to secure your privacy during this difficult time.