Maybe you’ve already been warned about the dangers of using social media while your divorce is proceeding, but the idea of shutting down your accounts from now until some unspecified future date is out of the question.
How do you post and still protect yourself from problems? Adjusting your privacy settings to the maximum and narrowing your list of “friends” can help, but it’s hard to understand exactly what kinds of things could be problematic. Here are three things you never post on social media while going through a divorce:
Revenge fantasies
When you’re hurt and angry, it’s easy to start dreaming about revenge – but keep your thoughts to yourself, especially if those revenge fantasies are in any way criminal or violent. Assume that anything you post will absolutely end up being read aloud in court in front of a judge and that you’ll have to explain whether you actually intended to do what you said. That kind of thing can deeply hurt a custody case, especially if you’re trying to convince the court that you can effectively support the parent-child relationship between your ex-spouse and your child.
New relationships
Maybe you’ve already emotionally distanced yourself from your marriage and want to find someone new – and that’s okay. What’s not okay is to post about the new relationship while your divorce is pending. Changing your relationship status and posting pictures of your new partner hanging with you and the kids at the beach is likely to antagonize your spouse, and that can sharply curtail any progress you’re making toward agreements on the division of property, child custody or support.
Drinking or drug use
Think that “4:20” meme is harmless? Think again. If your spouse is trying to allege that you have a substance abuse problem to deprive you of shared custody, that could add fuel to the fire. Similarly, photos of you kicking back at cocktail hour in a restaurant or bar could be an indicator that you may have a drinking problem that might make you an unsafe parent.
When you’re going through a divorce, you don’t have to go through it alone. Experienced legal guidance can help demystify the process.