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Can divorce mediation work if you can’t stand your ex?

On Behalf of | Feb 4, 2022 | Divorce Mediation

Mediation is a powerful tool for those who want to minimize conflict when they divorce. It can also help you keep your divorce expenses low and lead to the creation of a truly customized property division settlement or parenting plan for your children.

Unfortunately, mediation requires that you work with your ex, which can be really hard during the intensely emotional early stages of divorce. If you can’t look at your ex without getting into a fight with them, you may feel like mediation isn’t an option for your divorce disputes.

Despite the current high level of conflict, divorce mediation could still work for your family.

You don’t have to sit face-to-face to mediate

There is little question that mediation is most productive and efficient when the divorcing spouses are together in a room. They can communicate quickly with one another and their attorneys, possibly leading to the resolution of their issues in as little as one session.

However, when emotions are high, your mediator might agree to an alternate process where they go back and forth between you and your ex while you stay in separate rooms.

You do need a willingness to compromise

Although you don’t necessarily need to see or talk to your ex directly to successfully mediate, you do need to compromise. Both you and your ex will likely need to make some minor concessions to reach an agreement that you can both abide by after the divorce. Exploring what matters most to you before mediation can help you focus on your major priorities rather than letting your feelings run the show.

The mediator can potentially help the two of you find ways to resolve your biggest issues so that an uncontested divorce is an option. Learning more about how divorce mediation works can empower you to use this tool at the end of your marriage.


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