Going through a divorce is a traumatic event, no matter how amicable the process was. You mourn the lost dream you had of sustaining a long-term, happy marriage. You face many conflicting emotions, such as confusion, anger, sorrow and relief.
Although it may have come with the silver lining of learning things about yourself, your ex and relationships in general, you likely do not want to go through divorce again. It is best to be prepared on how to avoid a subsequent legal split before you jump back into the dating pool if you so desire, so you can lower the high risk of divorce that comes with a second marriage.
Talk to a therapist
There were likely many factors that contributed to the end of your marriage. Talking to a licensed marital counselor can help you review them to ensure they are not problems in a future marriage. You can learn to recognize when a potential partner is not good for you or a relationship is becoming unhealthy. Therapy can also be helpful to go to as a couple before remarriage, especially if it will lead to a blended family.
Take time to yourself
It may be tempting to reenter the dating scene right away to avoid feeling lonely or to build up your self-esteem. However, it is better to take some time to fully grieve and take care of yourself. Work on a hobby you normally do not have time for or develop a new talent. Get to know yourself and your goals so you can make the best choices for your life.
Do things differently
The next relationship you are in, nurture it by practicing these important skills:
- Be vulnerable with your partner to create emotional intimacy
- Have realistic expectations of love and share them with your partner
- Communicate effectively and respectfully
You may also want to protect yourself financially by drafting a prenuptial agreement if you choose to tie the knot again.